3 more months to SIP! I'm counting down to it, but I'm not anticipating it. I just want the pay!

I thought of the past. My life was once colourful. Why the hell is it just black and white now? I looked at the old pictures, especially those during 2004. I smiled. I recalled the happy times, the joyous moments, laughing heartily, eyes gleaming with joy. They are all gone. They are now nothing but broken memories. I'd rather not have them, for that I would not see the contrast now.

I hardly laugh my heart out now. I hardly smile genuinely. I no longer dress in flamboyant colours, it's almost only black. But I'm trying to wear colours like blue or white... Not much difference though.

Each day, I think I'm walking closer to darkness. I don't know, I don't want to. But I can't help it, I can't control.

My happy split is dead.